Friday

 

Yesterday after writing the last post I signed onto Facebook to see this entry from a high school friend:

“Just bought my plane tickets to the Philippians”.

 

I “unfriended” her immediately.

 

While my friend was packing her bikini, spf 40, and a juicy novel I was preparing dinner for hooligans.

 

The dinner party conversation for 9-year-olds went something like this:

Boy 1: Guess what?

Boy 2: Chicken butt.

 

Boy 1: Guess why?

Boy 2: Chicken thigh.

 

Boy 1: Guess how?

Boy 2: Chicken kung pow.

 

The two brain cells I have left just died.

 

Then the two boy geniuses decided to challenge each other to a bug eating contest.

 

 

bug in hand

This kid

and this kid claim they will eat the bug.

Tasty, was it young man?

 

I can’t believe she’s packing for the Philippians right now and I’m listening to jokes about Chicken booties and watching children ingest insects at the evening meal.

What did I do wrong in my life to deserve this?

Today

tomorrow

Sunday

For all eternity

Melbourne, Australia

 

In other news, if you are in a 50 mile (or more if you don’t mind the drive) radius of my house and want to witness the most spectacular fire of all time please come by. Unless, of course, if you are a creep then feel free to get lost on the way over.

In spite of my sour sounding blog post I, Elizabeth Johnson, do solemnly swear I will not let any pithy words of envy or bitter musings about the weather leave my trachea at the party tonight. My attitude will be just as spectacular as the fire.

Now that’s worth coming to see.